Myth 1: Luck is the essence of romance.
Luck has very little to do with romance, other than to maintain the illusion that we are helpless pawns in the game of love. Most folks engage in their search for a partner and then hope for the best. These people have no expectation of winning. Many people approach romance in the same way that they approach a gambling table in Las Vegas. They put their dollar on the crap table, roll the dice, and pray. Professional gamblers, however, do everything in their power to increase the odds in their favor. And serious people do everything in their power to increase their possibilities of meeting the person of their dreams.
I am reminded of the story of a young man who regularly prays to God to win the lottery. Day after day, week after week he prays and prays and nothing happens. Then one day, in the middle of his prayers, he hears thunder and lightening and the voice of God booms down upon him. "Charlie, meet me half way, buy a ticket." People tend to pray, wish, hope, and dream about finding their ideal mate, but they seldom develop a strategy or plan of action. They spend more time and energy planning a dinner party than the most important human relationship of their lives.
Myth 2: Marriages are made in heaven.
This myth is similar to the first one in that it assumes that relationships are preordained, out of the hands of ordinary mortals. It assumes that we do not have any control over the mates we end up with and that we must settle for those that we find. Human beings make choices. Many of them are poor choices -- especially when it comes to mate selection.
While this myth has romantic overtones, it denies human beings responsibility for their choices. It leaves us at the mercy of some fictitious master plan governing our lives and the freedom to choose is obviated.
If, indeed, marriages were made in heaven, then God made a great many mistakes. Rather than attribute those mistakes to God, we should exercise our God-given right to choose and learn how to make more effective choices. God doesn't provide us with a mate--rather God provides us with the ability to choose.
Myth 3: There is only one partner that is perfect for each of us.
If this were the case, then it would not be possible for people to have happiness in a marriage after the death of a spouse. Clearly, since people do indeed find happiness in second and even third marriages, there is more than one potential mate available for each of us. Our job is to increase the probabilities of finding those potential partners.
To find these potential mates we must develop a strategy. Just as there is more than one house we can fall in love with, there is more than one potential mate. If we increase the pool of available partners, we can then fall in love with any one of them. The trick is to set up our criteria, take appropriate actions, and then allow for nature to take its course.
A friend decided that he wanted to marry a woman who was beautiful, had considerable financial backing, and was of the same religion as he. He only dated women after he checked their family's financial standing with Dunn and Bradstreet, who belonged to his church, and whom he found to be beautiful. By surrounding himself with rich, beautiful women of the same religion, he could then allow himself to fall in love with any one of them.
Showing posts with label action. Show all posts
Showing posts with label action. Show all posts
Tuesday, 29 July 2008
Wednesday, 23 July 2008
Batman Is Back
There's a beautiful high-angle shot, early in The Dark Knight, that looks down on Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) in full Batman regalia as he perches atop a Gotham skyscraper, surveying the city he lives to protect, then leaping off and spreading his majestic bat wings to swoop down into the night. Bruce's trajectory is also the film's. It traces a descent into moral anarchy, and each of its major characters will hit bottom. Some will never recover, broken by the touch of evil or by finding it, like a fatal infection, in themselves.
The Dark Knight, Christopher Nolan's second chapter in his revival of the DC Comics franchise, will hit theaters with all the hoopla and fanboy avidity of the summer season's earlier movies based on comic books. It's the fifth, and three of the first four (Iron Man, Wanted and Hellboy II) have been terrific or just short of it. (The Incredible Hulk: not so hot.) It's been one of the best summers in memory for flat-out blockbuster entertainment, and in the wow category, the Nolan film doesn't disappoint. True to format, it has a crusading hero, a sneering villain in Heath Ledger's Joker, spectacular chases — including one with Batman on a stripped-down Batmobile that becomes a motorcycle with monster-truck wheels — and lots of stuff blowing up. Even the tie-in action figures with Reese's Pieces suggest this is a fast-food movie.
But Nolan has a more subversive agenda. He wants viewers to stick their hands down the rat hole of evil and see if they get bitten. With little humor to break the tension, The Dark Knight is beyond dark. It's as black — and teeming and toxic — as the mind of the Joker. Batman Begins, the 2005 film that launched Nolan's series, was a mere five-finger exercise. This is the full symphony.
A Better Class of CriminalGotham has a new white knight: a fearless district attorney, Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart), who's determined to nab malefactors through the law with the same gusto that Batman, the dark knight, applies using his gadgets and charisma. The Mob (led by Eric Roberts) they can handle, with the help of stalwart police lieutenant James Gordon (Gary Oldman). But the Joker — this guy is nuts. He does deals with the Mob, then crosses them up. He makes a point with his pencil by ramming it into a gangster's head. "This town," he says, "deserves a better class of criminals." So do action movies, and here he is, vowing to bring down Batman and Dent, just for the mad fun of it.
In its rethinking and transcending of a schlock source, The Dark Knight is up there with David Cronenberg's 1986 version of The Fly. It turns pulp into dark poetry. Just as that movie found metaphors of cancer, AIDS and death in the story of a man devolving into an insect, so this one plumbs the nature of identity. Who are we? Has Bruce lost himself in the myth of the hero? Is his Batman persona a mission or an affliction? Can crusading Dent live down the nickname (Two-Face) some rancorous cops have pinned on him? Only the Joker seems unconflicted. He knows what he is: an "agent of chaos." Your worst nightmare.
No, really. This villain, as conceived by Nolan and his scriptwriter brother Jonathan and incarnated with chilling authority by Ledger, is not the elegant sadist of so many action films, nor the strutting showman played by Jack Nicholson in Tim Burton's 1989 Batman. He isn't a father figure or a macho man. And though he invents several stories about how he got his (facial and psychic) scars, he's not presented as the sum of injustices done to him. This Joker is simply one of the most twisted and mesmerizing creeps in movie history.
The Dark Knight, Christopher Nolan's second chapter in his revival of the DC Comics franchise, will hit theaters with all the hoopla and fanboy avidity of the summer season's earlier movies based on comic books. It's the fifth, and three of the first four (Iron Man, Wanted and Hellboy II) have been terrific or just short of it. (The Incredible Hulk: not so hot.) It's been one of the best summers in memory for flat-out blockbuster entertainment, and in the wow category, the Nolan film doesn't disappoint. True to format, it has a crusading hero, a sneering villain in Heath Ledger's Joker, spectacular chases — including one with Batman on a stripped-down Batmobile that becomes a motorcycle with monster-truck wheels — and lots of stuff blowing up. Even the tie-in action figures with Reese's Pieces suggest this is a fast-food movie.
But Nolan has a more subversive agenda. He wants viewers to stick their hands down the rat hole of evil and see if they get bitten. With little humor to break the tension, The Dark Knight is beyond dark. It's as black — and teeming and toxic — as the mind of the Joker. Batman Begins, the 2005 film that launched Nolan's series, was a mere five-finger exercise. This is the full symphony.
A Better Class of CriminalGotham has a new white knight: a fearless district attorney, Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart), who's determined to nab malefactors through the law with the same gusto that Batman, the dark knight, applies using his gadgets and charisma. The Mob (led by Eric Roberts) they can handle, with the help of stalwart police lieutenant James Gordon (Gary Oldman). But the Joker — this guy is nuts. He does deals with the Mob, then crosses them up. He makes a point with his pencil by ramming it into a gangster's head. "This town," he says, "deserves a better class of criminals." So do action movies, and here he is, vowing to bring down Batman and Dent, just for the mad fun of it.
In its rethinking and transcending of a schlock source, The Dark Knight is up there with David Cronenberg's 1986 version of The Fly. It turns pulp into dark poetry. Just as that movie found metaphors of cancer, AIDS and death in the story of a man devolving into an insect, so this one plumbs the nature of identity. Who are we? Has Bruce lost himself in the myth of the hero? Is his Batman persona a mission or an affliction? Can crusading Dent live down the nickname (Two-Face) some rancorous cops have pinned on him? Only the Joker seems unconflicted. He knows what he is: an "agent of chaos." Your worst nightmare.
No, really. This villain, as conceived by Nolan and his scriptwriter brother Jonathan and incarnated with chilling authority by Ledger, is not the elegant sadist of so many action films, nor the strutting showman played by Jack Nicholson in Tim Burton's 1989 Batman. He isn't a father figure or a macho man. And though he invents several stories about how he got his (facial and psychic) scars, he's not presented as the sum of injustices done to him. This Joker is simply one of the most twisted and mesmerizing creeps in movie history.
Wednesday, 16 July 2008
Hip-Hop Grows Up
Coming from the mean streets of Atlanta, T.I. seemed to have the chips stacked against him.
Having to endure the violence in the Black community, the rapper whose real name is Clifford Harris seemed an unlikely candidate for stardom behind the microphone and on the silver screen and resorted to drug dealing to make ends meet.
However, the self-proclaimed "King of the South" turned hardship into heaven, as he conquered the entertainment world with films such as American Gangster and classic songs like "Motivation."
Despite enjoying enormous success and finding strength to overcome the brutal murder of his best friend, federal authorities arrested T.I. on October 13, 2007, as he was set to perform at the second annual BET HIP HOP AWARDS in Atlanta for giving cash to a bodyguard to buy firearms.
Facing a one year prison sentence, T.I. recently spoke with Toure' from BET to discuss his past mistakes, the young fans who admire him, and the paranoia that comes with being a visible celebrity.
"Everyone knew me and I knew no one ... you can't tell if a person is a fan or not until the (car) window winds down," T.I. explained.
Despite the dangers that come with superstardom, T.I. made no excuses for his past behaviors and used the 30-minute interview to speak out against the violence in the Black community and his position as a role model to the children who come from the same mean streets that he was able to overcome.
The multi-platinum rapper warned his young fans that going to jail for one year is not cool by any means. He talked about the money he will lose because of his incarceration and the lives of his family members, employees and artists that his actions affected.
A rapper who once glorified the violence in the Black community is now realizing that there is more to being a man than carrying a weapon.
"I must be a man and stand up and accept responsibility. I exercised extremely poor judgment and for that, I must be willing to pay the price that comes before me," he said.
With a new CD, a new baby and an upcoming marriage on the horizon, T.I. believes that this recent ordeal has given him a new perspective on life and he is determined to be a voice for children who come from the same environment as him.
For many years, hip-hop artists have been criticized for its vulgar and misogynistic lyrics, which some blame for the rise in violence in the Black community. Despite the criticism, many artists have been hesitant to take responsibilities for their actions as well as their lyrics.
However, T.I.'s run-in with the law at the height of his popularity has made the iconic rapper reevaluate his life and his affect on the younger generation.
During the BET interview, he warned a group of at-risk youth about allowing temporary emotions to ruin your life permanently.
The rapper admitted that temporary emotions is the cause of many his encounters with the law, and the reason for much of the violence in the Black community.
In addition, he is hoping that his recent mistakes can do a lot to solve some of problems facing the hip-hop community, especially the younger generation of hip-hop fans.
Having to endure the violence in the Black community, the rapper whose real name is Clifford Harris seemed an unlikely candidate for stardom behind the microphone and on the silver screen and resorted to drug dealing to make ends meet.
However, the self-proclaimed "King of the South" turned hardship into heaven, as he conquered the entertainment world with films such as American Gangster and classic songs like "Motivation."
Despite enjoying enormous success and finding strength to overcome the brutal murder of his best friend, federal authorities arrested T.I. on October 13, 2007, as he was set to perform at the second annual BET HIP HOP AWARDS in Atlanta for giving cash to a bodyguard to buy firearms.
Facing a one year prison sentence, T.I. recently spoke with Toure' from BET to discuss his past mistakes, the young fans who admire him, and the paranoia that comes with being a visible celebrity.
"Everyone knew me and I knew no one ... you can't tell if a person is a fan or not until the (car) window winds down," T.I. explained.
Despite the dangers that come with superstardom, T.I. made no excuses for his past behaviors and used the 30-minute interview to speak out against the violence in the Black community and his position as a role model to the children who come from the same mean streets that he was able to overcome.
The multi-platinum rapper warned his young fans that going to jail for one year is not cool by any means. He talked about the money he will lose because of his incarceration and the lives of his family members, employees and artists that his actions affected.
A rapper who once glorified the violence in the Black community is now realizing that there is more to being a man than carrying a weapon.
"I must be a man and stand up and accept responsibility. I exercised extremely poor judgment and for that, I must be willing to pay the price that comes before me," he said.
With a new CD, a new baby and an upcoming marriage on the horizon, T.I. believes that this recent ordeal has given him a new perspective on life and he is determined to be a voice for children who come from the same environment as him.
For many years, hip-hop artists have been criticized for its vulgar and misogynistic lyrics, which some blame for the rise in violence in the Black community. Despite the criticism, many artists have been hesitant to take responsibilities for their actions as well as their lyrics.
However, T.I.'s run-in with the law at the height of his popularity has made the iconic rapper reevaluate his life and his affect on the younger generation.
During the BET interview, he warned a group of at-risk youth about allowing temporary emotions to ruin your life permanently.
The rapper admitted that temporary emotions is the cause of many his encounters with the law, and the reason for much of the violence in the Black community.
In addition, he is hoping that his recent mistakes can do a lot to solve some of problems facing the hip-hop community, especially the younger generation of hip-hop fans.
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